Stare at breasts, live longer

Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Dardedar » Fri Feb 25, 2011 8:40 pm

Here's to a long life! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go work out...

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Stare at boobs for longer life: Study

Frankfurt, Germany, December 6 -- A rather bizarre study carried out by German researchers suggests that staring at women's breasts is good for men's health and increases their life expectancy

According to Dr. Karen Weatherby, a gerontologist and author of the study, gawking at women’s breasts is a healthy practice, almost at par with an intense exercise regime, that prolongs the lifespan of a man by five years.

She added, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female, is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out."

A five-year research on 500 men
Researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany did an in-depth analysis of 200 healthy males over a period of five years. Half the volunteers were instructed to ogle at the breasts of women daily, while the rest were told to refrain from doing so.

At the close of the study, the researchers noted that the men who stared at the breasts of females on a regular basis exhibited lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and lesser episodes of coronary artery disease.

Sexual desire linked to better blood circulation
The researchers declared that sexual desire gives rise to better blood circulation that signifies an overall improved health.

Weatherby explained the concept stating, "Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. There's no question: Gazing at breasts makes men healthy.

"Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half. We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life four to five years."

In addition, she also recommended that men over 40 should gaze at larger breasts daily for 10 minutes.

The German research is believed to be published in the New England Journal of Medicine."

LINK

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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Dardedar » Fri Feb 25, 2011 9:54 pm

Oh shoot. Just now noticed the "is believed to be published in the New England Journal of Medicine." "Busted."

From:

http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/medica ... reasts.htm

***
No such study was ever published in the New England Journal of Medicine (check for yourself).

A search of the thousands of peer-reviewed articles contained in the National Institutes of Health PubMed database turns up zero items documenting the health benefits of staring at women's breasts, and, for that matter, zero items authored by "Dr. Karen Weatherby" (who does not exist, so far as I can tell).

If the story smacks of tabloid faux-journalism, well, that's precisely what it is. The text hit the Internet in March or April 2000, mere weeks after a strikingly similar article appeared in the consistently misinformative Weekly World News (nor is this the first time we've encountered baseless Internet rumors traceable to precisely that source). A slightly different version had already appeared in the May 13, 1997 issue of the tabloid.
"I'm not a skeptic because I want to believe, I'm a skeptic because I want to know." --Michael Shermer
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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby L.Wood » Sat Feb 26, 2011 12:00 am

.

Any more examples of "tabloid faux-journalism?" We need more of these exposures to help keep us straight.

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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Savonarola » Sat Feb 26, 2011 2:30 am

Darrel wrote:A search of the thousands of peer-reviewed articles contained in the National Institutes of Health PubMed database turns up zero items documenting the health benefits of staring at women's breasts...

Are there any articles that conclude that there are health risks arising from staring at women's breasts? Because if not... :shock:
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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby kwlyon » Sat Feb 26, 2011 12:23 pm

Who cares if you live longer...you will live better.
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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Doug » Sat Feb 26, 2011 8:12 pm

Savonarola wrote:Are there any articles that conclude that there are health risks arising from staring at women's breasts? Because if not... :shock:


DOUG
Yes. A punch in the nose or a swift kick in the nuts are health risks...if you stare too long.
"We could have done something important Max. We could have fought child abuse or Republicans!" --Oona Hart (played by Victoria Foyt), in the 1995 movie "Last Summer in the Hamptons."
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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Savonarola » Sat Feb 26, 2011 8:53 pm

Doug wrote:Yes. A punch in the nose or a swift kick in the nuts are health risks...if you stare too long.
Fine, Doug, I promise not to stare at your breasts.
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Re: Stare at breasts, live longer

Postby Doug » Sun Feb 27, 2011 12:04 am

Savonarola wrote:
Doug wrote:Yes. A punch in the nose or a swift kick in the nuts are health risks...if you stare too long.
Fine, Doug, I promise not to stare at your breasts.


DOUG
'Tis better to give than to receive, but I was not speaking as a distributor of said punishments.

By the way, "Stare at breasts, live longer" was replaced by "Live long and prosper" in the Star Trek series after test audiences were confused by some of the dialogue in early episodes. Some obscure Trekkie trivia...
"We could have done something important Max. We could have fought child abuse or Republicans!" --Oona Hart (played by Victoria Foyt), in the 1995 movie "Last Summer in the Hamptons."
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